Where this posts comes from is what I have learned and come to realizations with in the last few months. This is not all based on the pandemic, but part of it has been driven by it.
Being and doing the same thing as everyone else has never been in mine or Scott’s nature. Going against that nature from what we have found makes us unhappy.
I don’t need a traditional house to be happy and apparently neither do our kids. Scott has always wanted to live tiny from the time we were engaged. He only had to wait like 12 years for me to consider it.
I never saw a truck being my primary vehicle. Strangely when we got it (Toyota Tundra), It just felt like me more than anything else has. It only took 2 Camry’s, a Chevy, 2 GMC’s, a 4-Runner, and a minivan to find that out.
Raising our kids on a mini farm for any duration of time has always been something I have wondered if we would ever do and actually want to do. We started with chickens in early summer. We have since adopted baby goats. We have baby ducks on the way. Needless to say, we cannot seem to get enough of baby farm animal cuteness and raising them.
These are all maybe small and silly realizations, but sometimes when you take a step back it’s like an epiphany. Like Hey, I haven’t had these things in a long time and don’t really miss them. It feels kinda strange not to miss them, but on the other hand I see where my focus is now and I am much happier with this direction. I say I, but it is with all of us. The kiddos are learning, sharing, and playing together. Scott is finally in a position where he is happier in his work position and getting to be with us more. For myself, it has been finding the old me and new me at the same time. After becoming a mom, it became hard to remember the old me and what my passions were before. It’s sometimes just easier to make sure everyone else is happy and put yourself on the back burner. I now know that doesn’t work for anyone because eventually you can’t suppress that anymore. It has taken these dramatic modifications to our life to force me to make those changes, quit suppressing, and start living for not just my family, but for myself as well.
This is of course did not all occur overnight. We’ve spent much time feeling lost without direction. We are of course still lost to a point, but this time we are happy and lost. When I look back to before when we felt lost without direction, we weren’t willing to do anything to make big modifications to our life. What we have learned is that modifications are scary, but necessary to make the changes you want to see in yourself and in your family.
Making these kinds of decisions is of course easier when you have Jesus on your side. God will always provide a way. That’s something we have always leaned on.
